Embrace true awareness and elevate yourself to the next level and uncover your higher purpose. 

While we might not like to admit it, many of us are creatures of habit. Whether it’s your weekly shopping list, your coffee order, where you stand on the platform to take a train or what route you like to run, chances are, you spend a lot of your life on repeat. Don’t we all! But that’s why, when something comes along that you want to change, it’s not always easy. 

“Learning any new habit can be extremely hard and it can take a lot of time for those new habits to feel natural. It’s good to remember that change has five stages: pre-contemplation, contemplation, preparation, action and maintenance so it’s important to allow yourself the space to work through each of these stages thoroughly. The more space you can give yourself, the less likely you are to fall straight back into old patterns and ways of being,” explains psychotherapist and author, Tasha Bailey. 

The power of transformation is something that ancient  alchemists worked hard to achieve. Through a process of purification and removing anything that didn’t serve them, alchemists believed that they could connect with a higher purpose and alter their life in impactful ways. For the transformation to be successful, they stressed the need to be authentic and honest about your strengths and weaknesses and what you truly desire and fear. Something that positive psychology practioner, Ruth Cooper-Dickson still believes is at the crux of how to make changes. “We must know what or why we want to change. There must be a driving factor that matters to you. The intention behind the change is as important as whether you make the change or not,” she says.  

What do you want to achieve? 

By connecting with your purpose through true awareness, it can help you feel more aligned in your end goals and give you the enlightenment and willingness to embrace the changes head on. However, even once you’ve given yourself something to aim for you need to put practices in place to get you there because no matter how motivated you are, everyone has down days that can scupper the best laid plans. 

“It’s great to visualise the positive things that will come from your changes so hold the end goal in mind but also acknowledge that any change is a process that takes commitment and dedication. Think of the need to create a discipline. In yoga we refer to this as creating ‘tapas’, drawing on our fire energy to fuel us and give us ‘burning enthusiasm’. I like to think of this as a way of channelling energy towards what we want in our life as motivation will depend on what other things are taking our energy – responsibilities, stress and whatever else we need to prioritise,” advises Dr Alicia Ray, psychologist and yoga therapist. 

Focus on mini moments 

Taking small steps to avoid overwhelm and cement new behaviours is key. “Research on neuroplasticity and mindfulness indicates that we really do have the capacity to change our thinking patterns and behaviours. With repeated practice our neural pathways can literally be rewired, but this process is not a simple or quick one,” continues Alicia. 

That’s why to succeed you need to take it one day at a time and unfortunately the idea that it takes 21 days to form a habit has been called out as a myth. “The average is 66 days based on a study in 2009 but it can take between 18 and 254 days depending on the individual and the repetition,” clarifies Ruth. “Breaking down your goal and focusing on 1% small incremental changes you can build on will mean you’re less likely to give up. And keep reminding yourself why it’s important and why you’re doing this. Visual reminders on your phone, on the fridge, on the mirror – whatever helps!” 

“I’d recommend dedicating at least 30 mins of your day to creating your new habit or goal and then reflecting on what you’ve done that day to get closer to the end result, says Dalila Salgueiro, positive psychology coach and founder of the Manifesting App. “If you’re not feeling inspired, revisit your goal and be honest - being as sincere and authentic as possible will help you get to the root of any blocked paths.”  

Celebrate yourself 

Many of the pro’s also recommend habit stacking. “This is where you build new habits on top of existing ones. A lot of what we do every day is repeated in the same context, usually without thinking so it makes sense to double up,” says Ruth. From listening to a confidence boosting podcast while you’re getting ready for work to doing some stretches while you’re making your morning coffee, think minimum effort, maximum results. 

Finally, setting yourself targets and rewards is another way to keep you on the right track - whether it’s a health and fitness goal, building confidence or trying something new. “Your brain thrives on dopamine hits so it’s always a good idea to celebrate yourself while you’re on the journey of change,” recommends Tasha. Whatever that is – a yoga class, dog walk, some chocolate, a nap, by putting in place some self-care essentials, it will help you stick to your guns.  

Want to discover how to put things into practice? Here’s how to up your game in 5 different ways: 

1. Become a morning person 

It might not sound positive, but plan to fail, says Ruth: “Know that you will get in your own way when it comes to building new habits because the brain loves comfort and will do everything to keep you safe. If your goal is to be a morning person, have your clothes laid out the night before, set an alarm in a different room or start waking up 10 minutes earlier. Switching from an 8am to a 5.30am wake-up is too extreme to begin with.” 

2. Change careers 

If you’re looking for a new job or a career change, think about what you did and didn’t love about your previous role and channel your inner alchemist by addressing your fears around what’s next. “Spend time researching – reading books, attending workshops, speaking to peers in that field who can share their knowledge and help you avoid disappointment. And rather than focussing on whether you’re right for the job, think about whether the job or career is right for you,” says Tasha. Small wins such as making 10 new LinkedIn connections a week, applying for two jobs a month or even updating your CV will all ensure you don’t stray from the end goal too. 

3. Achieve a sporting goal 

Whether it’s running a 5k, a hiking challenge, competing in a tournament, it’s about being patient and persevering to achieve the end result. If you’ve never run before, commit to doing a walk several times a week to build up endurance. Use an app to record your progress or commit to training with others to keep you on track. Don’t let bad days lead you astray either. “We are likely to see any lapse in our new habit as a failure but new habits do not become ‘undone’. If we miss a day, we simply need to come back with a fresh energy,” advises Alicia. 

4. Change your eating habits 

“It’s normal to have off days so input that into your healthy eating plan,” admits Dalila. If you cut out treats every day for a month, the chances of you sticking to that long term are low as your body and mind will feel tired from the restriction, plus you may start to resent your own goal. Tricks like preparing the following days’ snacks while you’re cooking dinner or doing a weekly online shop so you can plan ahead will also keep you in the right lane. 

5. Be more confident 

A lot of feeling more confident is building up acts of self-love and recognising your self-worth. “Celebrating your achievements and what got you there is a good starting place,” says Dalila. “Listening to positive affirmation podcasts, working on a growth mindset and freeing your mind of external pressures can all help too.” Again, this is where authenticity and awareness of your own needs come into play. If you can tap into those, learn to say no, identify your weaknesses and be brave enough to leave your comfort zone, your confidence levels will soon start to soar.